In the past few weeks, two horrifying events have been reported: the bombing of the Boston Marathon, which killed three people and injured more than 170, and the suicide of Audrie Pott, the young teen driven to death by being bullied. Both of these tragedies are examples of “extreme bully mentality,” the imposition of another's will through force, intimidation and violence. Whether by an act of terrorism or sexual predation, the bully has killed and maimed and damaged our lives, our hearts, and our souls. But I believe that together we can stand up for ourselves and each other. That together we can make it clear that we will not be stopped by the actions of a bully.
We as a nation are reeling from the psychological impact of terrorism. We have been victimized by strangers who feel it is justified to use deadly force on innocent people, for whatever reason. We are vulnerable to unreasonable, malevolent actions intended to do great harm to us. We are not safe on our streets, at work or at home. We have been violated and our rights abused.
Audrie Pott was allegedly sexually assaulted and marked with black ink over her body parts by three suspects that she knew, and confronted online, to no avail. A humiliating photo of her had been circulated to schoolmates the day she decided her life was over and hanged herself. Although several friends and classmates knew of the incident at the party where underage teens, Audrie, too, had been drinking, no one spoke up or spoke out and no one stopped the alleged sexual assault to Audrie. The three young men who are suspects in Audrie’s assault took pictures of her half-naked with their names inked on her body so that she clearly knew the next day when she awoke who had been where as she lay in a drunken state in an upstairs bedroom. Then they had the audacity to share photos of her with classmates and friends. She had not been violated three times in one night; she was repeatedly violated over and over on a daily basis until she felt she had no other escape but suicide.
Sadly, Audrie Pott is not the only teenager driven to death by being bullied. To the young men who did that to Audrie, and to the other men who perpetuate violence on women, you have blood on your hands. And to the others who looked at Audrie’s photos and snickered, laughed or high-fived each other, you, too, are splattered with blood. As are the ones who knew right action from wrong action and did not stand up, did not speak up, did nothing. Evil triumphs when ‘good’ people do nothing, to paraphrase a quote attributed to Edmund Burke. If this is too harsh to state, then let me remind you that these acts were not “pranks”; these acts were a “big deal” and immoral, as well as illegal.
It is in my not-so-humble opinion that we must act. We must do something to change this bully mentality. I can only imagine a little of the nightmare that Audrie’s family is suffering; and the families of the alleged perpetuators. Would this have had tragic consequences had there been intervention sooner by the school authorities, the parents, bystanders? I am comparing sexual predation to the acts of terrorism because there is a similarity of an attitude that one does not have to respect another’s rights of being. I do not have any solutions for the global terrorism, but I will advocate for victim’s rights and the right for all children to be safe in their homes, schools and playgrounds. Anywhere, to be safe, anywhere.
I cut out and will save the photo from the Seattle Times of Bill Iffrig, the Boston Marathon runner knocked down by the blast. He got up and crossed the finish line. I do not know his personal reasons for completing the last fifteen feet of the race, but for me, he symbolizes the spirit of one who will not be stopped by a bully.
