Talking to Your Kids About Consent, Power, & Sexuality

Want to Prevent Sexual Assault on College Campuses? Let's Start With Our Kindergarteners
by Krista Millay, Feminist, Social Justice Advocate, and Mother

There is a major problem with looking to colleges and universities to solve the problem of campus sexual assault. If there's any truth in the statistic that one in four undergraduate women are sexually assaulted during their university experience, then waiting until students arrive on campus is too late to start the prevention work. The conversation about healthy sexuality, consent, and bodies must start earlier - as early as kindergarten.

This early education could equip our children to have healthy relationships as young adults, changing the culture of college campuses across the country. But, equally important, it would also give children the language and skills to get assistance when an interaction is inappropriate right now, whether that interaction is with a friend or a perpetrator.

My university work around prevention has caused me to slow down and become aware of the unspoken assumptions we make about children's bodies, to start connecting the daily conversations I have with my children about body parts and hugs and kisses to the outcomes I wish for the college students whom I educate. As a parent, it occurs to me that there is something better we parents and educators can all do right now. We can begin to think differently about how sexuality, bodies, power, and consent are communicated, starting as early as kindergarten.

Read the entire article on HuffingtonPost.com>>


10 Ways To Talk To Your Kids About Sexual Abuse
by Sandra Kim

The idea of someone molesting your child is terrifying for any parent (unless the parent is the child molester, which is 37% of the time).

The pain, fear, and trauma they may experience at such a young age are frightening to consider. It’s enough to make any parent freak out and want to never ever think about it again.

And then we hope it will just never happen to our own child.

Except your daughter has a 1 in 4 chance and your son has a 1 in 6 chance of being molested before the age of 18.  Children with disabilities are 2.9 times more likely than children without disabilities to be sexually abused.

I know you don’t want to hear it or believe it. But it’s true.

And these statistics are too high for any parent to risk staying uninformed about the reality of child sexual abuse and not talking to their child about it.

On top of that, the majority of children never report sexual abuse when it’s happening. They’re often afraid of their parents’ reactions or fear getting into trouble. They don’t know how to explain what happened to them or believe what the abuser told them to keep them quiet.

Now, you can never protect your child fully from ever being molested. But you can do a lot to reduce your child’s vulnerability to sexual abuse and increase the chances they’ll tell you after something happens.

You just need to talk to them directly about it and do it many times.




Read the entire article on EverydayFeminism.com>>

What to Do When You're the Family Scapegoat

12 Steps to Breaking Free from Being the Family Scapegoat

by Glynis Sherwood

• Did you grow up having doubts about your self esteem or personal worth?  
• When things went wrong in your family, did you tend to be the fall guy?  
• Do you find yourself encountering recurring disrespect from friends or colleagues?  
• Do you feel unsure of yourself and/or have difficulty experiencing trust in relationships?

If you answered ‘Yes’ to any of these statements, you may have been scapegoated by your family. The term 'scapegoat' refers to a family member who takes the blame for difficulties in the family. Scapegoating is a form of bullying.  Family relationships profoundly impact our identity and how we view ourselves.

How to Tell if You Have Been Scapegoated:

You are held responsible for family problems, conflicts or challenges, even if they have nothing to do with you.  Other people blame you for their actions.  You may end up feeling a lot of shame for being ‘the bad guy’, and/or anger for being blamed for negative family dynamics.

You are attacked and disbelieved if you tell the truth and ‘blow the whistle’ on negative and/or inappropriate family dynamics.

There has been a history of one or more family members being verbally, emotionally or physically abusive towards you.  Other family members seem to accept or look the other way when you are bullied or aggressed against like this.  You may feel like the ‘black sheep’ of the family.

Read the entire article>>

About the Author: Glynis Sherwood - MEd, Canadian Certified Counsellor, Registered Clinical Counsellor, specializes in recovery from Scapegoating/Bullying, Low Self Esteem, Anxiety, Depression, Grief and Addictive Behaviors.